Do You Always Have To Critique Me?

I'm in a rather bad mood today. and it's... 8:33 in the morning.
Gah, i hate that.
But Mom does this thing where she constantly critiques me. CONSTANTLY. and it's driving me crazy.
she hates my hair, she hates the way i stand, she hates the way i look, the way i eat, does she like anything at all about me?
i'm sorry i'm not a model.
but it's really, really, really hard to even try to have good self esteem when the person in my life who should be the most proud of me, the most supportive, the one who should tell me i'm beautiful and all that instead tells me i look fat, or she hates the color i have to dye my hair, or i shouldn't slouch because it makes me look fat, or i shouldn't roll my shoulders forward, or i shouldn't dress like that because i'm showing too much skin. (You guys have met me. you know how i dress. do i look like a whore to you?)
anyway, i'm really rather upset. i'm not even really mad, i'm just... upset. it makes me feel sick to my stomach when she does this all the time. and then, if i look in the mirror, i immediately start judging myself too.
"You're not even good enough for your own mother."
that's all i hear when she starts in like that.
and it really, really hurts my feelings.
especially since i felt pretty today.
well, so much for that.
sorry this is depressing. but, seriously, if i don't talk about it, i'll explode. no, i won't. but i will cry, or tell someone who will tell mom. (I know you guys won't.)
well, i'm late to VBS. later, kids. i'll blog something happy tonight. i just really, really needed to get this off my chest, because i finally feel like i'm not going to burst into tears. (even if you guys aren't really listening. =])
later, gators.

Me

Busy To The Extreme

Want to know what i've been up to lately?
i'll give you a hint.
it starts with Jesus, and ends with Christ Superstar.
If you said Jesus Christ Superstar, or thought it, i don't know how many of you talk back to me, then you're RIGHT ON THE MONEY! (good for you!)
yeah. i've either been at JCS practice, or listening to the music, or looking at the music, or something (talking about it, thinking about it, that stuff.).
it's. consuming. my. life.
(i love it. =])
interesting things lately.
Logan went to London. do you know how freaking jealous i am? REALLY FREAKING JEALOUS. yeah. i wish i could go to London. but, before he left, we went and bought those... silly bands? i don't know. they're, like, rubber bands, but... shaped like animals? yeah, you totally know what i'm talking about. anyway, i've made lots of friends with them. granted, all these friends are under the age of nine, but i've immediately gone up in coolness points in the eyes of Mike and Max. (i babysit for them and their little sister, Macie, and they're my favorite kids. we have lightsaber fights and play football and baseball and video games and eat chicken nuggets and soon we're GOING TO THE ZOO OMG THE ZOO I FREAKING LOVE THE ZOOOOOO! i'm calm.) also, he took a journal, and he's been writing in it. (that's important to me! i can't wait to read it!)
he's coming back late tonight, so i'll get to see him tomorrow. also coming back are two of my altos for JCS. which is good.
see, currently there are four of us. (and one of them is singing the part of Simon. so she constantly decides that she'd rather go sing with the tenors. P.S. her boyfriend is in the tenor section. so every time she goes to sing with the tenors, really she's sitting by her boyfriend. but, just saying, WE NEED HER! i'm the loudest alto. it's not that the other altos are bad, they're wonderful! they're just quiet. so we NEED ALTOS. and there are lots of tenors. and ONE OF THEM IS JUDAS! AND ONE OF THEM IS HEROD! (he played Jesus last year, too, so he's OBVIOUSLY good (and loud)!) so we need her. end tangent. =])
other things that are up.
uhm....
hanging out with Ray a lot.
started watching Bones.
VBS this week.
DID I MENTION THAT I'M GOING TO THE ZOO? yeah, i am.
Cleaning lots of stuff.
you know, the usual.
writing. things like that.

and with all the happy stuff out of the way...
Primrose died yesterday. she'd been sick for a while, so i expected it. but i'm still sad. and Cat is sad too. you can tell with animals. and she's sad, and that makes me sad, too. my room is depressing now.

so yeah. now i feel like i should say something humorous, because now my blog is depressing! stars, my blog can't be depressing!
oh, i'll think of something.
OH SNAP! i watched The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, and it was so freaking awesome. i love Heath Ledger. (WHY?! WHY DID YOU DO IT? it's not fair. Totally horrible. i miss you. -cries-(BTW, Ray has decided that -cries- is not strong enough. he apparently prefers -has a conniption fit- i just think he doesn't understand how AMAZING Heath Ledger was. -sobs-)) Cole and Danielle watched it before we did, and they were all like, "OMG WE DON'T UNDERSTAAAAAAAAAAAAND" and apparently hated it. and Ray and i watched it, and we were like "OMG THAT'S SO AAAAAAAAAAWESOME!"
it's pretty intense. a mi me gusta. =]

well, later, gators. go watch The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. and if you don't like it, i understand. (just don't ever speak to me again.) KIDDING! i'll still love you. (but you'll be dead.) just teasing. later, kids.
wish me luck at VBS. (8 kids tomorrow, under the age of two. one is a tiny, tiny infant who still takes a bottle and needs her head supported. two. workers. (OH STARS!))

Do You Know What's Really Annoying?

People being mad at you, when you have no idea what you've done. (same person as always hates my guts with a firey burning passion for no glaring or apparent reason except that my personality is grating? who knew... =] whatevs. actually, that sentence isn't about me.) Micah is mad at Garrett but won't tell him why. and i was just thinking... "That's incredibly annoying."
see, if you legitimately don't know what you've done, you totally can't fix it. which is why i make a point of telling people EXACTLY why they're pissing me off and should leave me alone for a while. in the long run, it's nicer.
Graduation. yay, you're a graduate! sit through 2+ hours of people droning ooon and oooooooooooooon and ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon about how, GOOD JOB! YOU'VE SURVIVED! (What? no way. news to me!) even worse, graduation practice. i kid you not, this was said."All right. then, we'll say, will the graduating seniors please stand. and that's when you all should stand."-slaps forehead- duh uuuh. we should, uh, stand? duuuuuhh..... i don't know if i can do that...
there was something else, the thing i ACTUALLY started my blog being annoyed about, but... i forget. =]
i was distracted by Cat and Prim. (Schrodinger's Cat and Primrose are my guinea pigs.) Prim was lying down, totally still. i was like, oh no... she's sick... and then Cat tiptoed over to her, and stretch out next to her, kind of at a right angle. and then Cat stuck her nose out, really close to Prim's side. it was really sweet, reminded me a little bit of me and Joelle (yeah, whatever.). and then Cat pulled her nose back, scooted a little closer, and inched her nose forward juuuuuuuuuust enough to touch the veeeeeeeeery side of Prim...who promptly jumped at her, scaring Kitty half to death, before prancing happily around the cage to the other side, where she laid down again. it. was. hilarious.oh, i remember the thing that was annoying me. FLOPPY DISKS. i was cleaning out my closet, and i found a floppy disk. A FLOPPY DISK. now, i'm a packrat, but... but... a floppy disk? what could i have POSSIBLY thought was important enough to keep even though it was on a floppy disk? i... i... i don't even know, and it's SUPER annoying. just saying.
oh, hey! i bought this cute little... cabinet? i don't know. it wasn't cute, actually. it was wooden, painted white but worn out and chipped and yet... i liked it. it's... okay. i'll start from the middle. three shelves in a glass front box thing. on either side of that are three shelves, level with the ones inside the box. top and bottom extend over the front and the sides. two knobs that look kind of like... bishop hats... on the top, as well as one that looks like a pawn in chess (except that one was really, really, really chipped.) two decorative pieces on the front that look kind of like badly drawn waves, going towards the pawn. on the bottom, four more bishops hats. (the bishops hats and the pawn held the whole thing together, i found. inventive.)
anyway, i saw it at my cousin's garage sale. bought it for, like, $1. totally thought it was, while dirty and worn and in bad shape and obviously hadn't been used for quite a while, a piece that would have some sort of... potential.so i bought it, took it home. (hello, new project.)
i took it apart. sanded it down. painted everything that was OUTSIDE the glass front box white. nobs, shelves, little wave things, black. sanded the pawn down so the back was flat, painted that black, too. then i painted a big tiger lily on the top... it was actually... really good. not trying to be narcissistic. i mean, i'm a terrible, terrible artist, but i'm pretty proud of how the tiger lily turned out. i used a weird green, kind of dark and greyish, to swirl out leaves, added a few tiger lily buds here and there. painted the backs of the shelves, the ones outside the glass front box, the same green as the top. the inside of the box i left the original, and might i add, gorgeous, wood. i put it all back together, and initialed on the back of the pawn. (in silver sharpie, woot woot!)
pictures, you ask? happy to oblige.

and the kicker... (in my opinion)
sorry, but i'm really, really, reaaaaaaaaaaaally proud of myself.
now. problems with it.
as you can see in the above picture, the handle is tilted. i tried to make it close better, the pull handle thing, but it broke a little bit. it doesn't seem to be totally, entirely broken. i mean, it works. it's just cockeyed. it bothers me.
the "thingy that looks like a wave." the one on the right, as you're looking at the picture above. the peg that held it in place was broken. (there are two, the one closest to the pawn was the one that was broken.) i pushed it in as well as i could, but it can move. gotta fix that.
the person who painted it white before left the inside the wood. i loved it, so i left it. but if you look closely, you realize they did a bad job of painting the outside--some of the white paint got on the inside. it bothers me.

so, that's my little cabinet. it think it's perty.
-giggles- yeah, i really love that tiger lily. i'm... pretty proud of myself. =]

okay... anything else before i go...
i need a new project.

OH!
so, i've been watching Dead Like Me. (love.)
first, they introduced a character named Ray, and he was a total douche. it made me chuckle. and then he tried to kill Daisy (who is already dead, she's a Reaper), and it stopped being funny, i just hated him.
anyway, after that i watched the series finale. (just finished it, it was TOTALLY awesome. i wish they'd made another season. but the only one after season 2 doesn't have Rube in it. no good. and it's not instant on Netflix, so it's not gonna happen.)
BACKGROUND!!!
okay, so, i associate certain things with people. (sometimes specific, like tigers with Joelle, or vague, like red hair with anyone named Garrett. which is silly--the Garretts i've known the longest don't have red hair...)
well, i associate white Chucks with Ray, okay? so i see people wearing white Chucks, and i'm like, RAY!
well, i was watching the series finale, and they showed JUST THE FEET (just the feet! (sinks into Strongbad lapse) of this person. (FOR THE WHOLE FINALE! like, you never saw his face at all. it wasn't like, THIS IS A MURDER MYSTERY! it was... like... you just need to know that it's a guy who's murdering people, you don't even need to know who it is, it's not important. what is important is that these people are going to die--they're lives are ending. it was a really cool move.) anyway, he was wearing white Chucks. and i was like OOH YAY PERSON WITH WHITE CHUCKS LIKE RAY!
until he started murdering everyone. and then i was like, wow, that sucks. first Ray's just a douche, and then his shoes are killing everyone! which made me laugh, which broke the mood, until the White Chucks murderer killed a little boy. he couldn't go trick-or-treating because he had a cold, and his daddy had just left to get him cold medicine. so he was home alone, wearing Devil costume. and it BROKE MY LITTLE HEART. i cried. not as much as when the cute little girl who was Mary in Kingdom Hospital died, but a lot.

uhm...
OH! Matt decided that i looked like this person, so he sent me her music video.
and that, my dear children, is how i discovered La Roux.
he doesn't like her, but i find myself strangely drawn to her. (can't even say why, i just like it.) but i've been listening to her A LOT. a lot a lot.
a mi me gusta. i'm going to go buy her CD so that i can stop playing her Youtube videos 80 bajillion times. =]

gotta go eat so i can graduate. later, kids!

Jack's A Moron (But I Still Love Him)

Oh boy, kids.

so, i was downstairs, happily texting Joelle and loading the dishwasher when...
Micah walks in.
holding Jack. (for those of you that don't know, that's one of my Jack Russell Terriers. The other one is Ruffi An. Jack, i know. i wanted to name him Captain, for the record. Dad wanted Jack. we settled for Captain Jack. that was when i was 11, so don't get any ideas about my mega crush on Johnny Depp. which i may or may not have. -shifty eyes- anyway...
that's Jack. yes, i take Christmas pictures of my dogs. ISN'T HE CUTE?!)
so, he walks in holding Jack, and Jackie is BLEEDING FROM THE SIDE.
you have to understand, my dogs are my babies. i take them outside, i play with them, i give them treats, i train them, i wash them, i cuddle them. when i'm sick, they curl up with me and give me kisses and are generally my bestest friends. i love my dogs.
so the fact that Jack was BLEEDING FROM THE SIDE set me a little on edge.
Me: WHAT HAPPENED?
Micah: Jack ran away.
Me: yeah, i knew he ran away, i knew you guys were out looking for him, but what did you DO?!
Micah: Jack got attacked by a Rottweiler.
Me: WHAT?
Micah: either go get a towel or hold him.
Me: -takes dog and cuddles-so i took him into the living room, and Micah brought me a washcloth, so i wiped him off. he had three cuts, one on the top of his butt, on on his lower side, and one right under his eye. so i washed them all of. now, the one under his eye looked fine. the one on his side was bleeding (all over me, thank you very much), but it looked okay, but the one on his butt looked bad... and wasn't bleeding.
so i called my Daddy.
and he was like, "i'm not sure. go bathe him, and be careful, he might bite."
so i took him upstairs and got him in the tub and washed him and soaped him up really good. now, normally, Jack is all over the place when he has to take a bath. (i have to wear a bathing suit.) but he was really quiet and subdued, which worried me. anyway, i toweled him off and took him to Dad, who was like, "Yeah, this one got down into the fatty tissue. so... keep it clean." and i was like, CAN DO!my poor puppy!
AH!
poor little guy. i love him bunches.
anyway, he got upset when Daddy was checking him over. and Mom was like,
"It's your own stupid fault, you moron! that Rottweiler was right where he belonged, in his own yard. TAKE NOTE!"
he's an idiot. dumb dog, worries me to death.
-sigh-
here's a picture of Ruffi An, because she's adorable. =]


yes, i take Halloween pictures of my dogs, too. i'm a sick, sick person. BUTTHEY'READORABLE LOOK AT HER SHE'S A LADYBUG! :D

And All The Rest

So, Sunday, i was at Calvary. we've been doing this dancing skit thing, and it's pretty cool.
it's called Behold, The Dreamer Cometh.

http://vimeo.com/5521830

it's pretty cool.
anyway, i managed to cut my hand on a board that was sitting on the ladder. (annoying!) now my thumb hurts. it's a more exciting story in person, so stop me and ask me if you see me. =]

I'M DONE WITH SCHOOL! NO MORE SCHOOL! YESTERDAY WAS MY LAST DAY!

i'll miss all my friends. i'm sure i will. BUT I'M DONE WITH SCHOOL!
and Sunday, JCS starts. i'm. playing. Mary. Magdalene.
you guys have NO IDEA how excited i am.
(okay, maybe you do...)

in other news.
Okay, so, recently, i acquired a copy of our Mooresville (show choir) competition (which did not zoom in! yay! i can watch the WHOLE show, instead of various random and boring faces, unable to see the feet!) and, possibly more importantly, a copy of our Pike (Concert Choir finals) competition...

so, essentially, i got a copy of Spring.
-cries-
i'm listening to it. we didn't do too bad. (and by that i mean i think it's beautiful, stupendous, marvelous, wonderful, the whole shebang.) Mr. Shank is such a fabulous composer, and Mrs. Prather is such a stellar director...

i'm going to miss her. i don't think i'll like not have a choir like that. i'm going to miss being one of the Madrigals. (3RD IN STATE, KIDS, 3RD IN STATE! i mean, wait what?)
from now on, i'm just a singer. On my own. (pretending he's beside me. all alone, i walk with him till morning. [don't judge.])

anyway. JCS is next. (SO. EXCITED. YOU ALL HAVE TO COME. JUST SAYING. IT. IS. NECESSARY. I'M SINGING. LOUDLY. AND ALL BY MYSELF. DO EEEET!)

i feel like there was something else i wanted to say... hmm...
ooh. John the Revelator. -shudder shudder-
scary stuff. (it was kinda shaky. but you all knew that. =] that high soprano note after the clapping part is... scary. bad scary. eww scary. i think, at least. but we still did well. and Spring... Spring was amazing.)

Katelyn and Maggie and Tom and i went out to China's Best today for lunch. since we all sat together in lunch, we decided we needed a final hurrah, as it were. it was so super fun. i love them soooooo much.

oh, right. i remember what i wanted to tell you all.
i'm feeling gutsy.
do you guys remember that i'm writing a book? it'll be my third. and i really like it. it's about Greek Gods. well, i've been working on it. and Joelle has been reading it. and... i want an outside opinion. it's not done yet. but i have a good 86 pages right now, and i'm going on a writing spree tomorrow. (Dad will be at work, Mom will be at work, i'll be home. ALONE. hello, glasses, hello, pigtails, hello, sweatpants, hello, story.) and if you want what i have, remember, it's not done, but if you want what i have...
i'll e-mail it to you.
(I thought about just offering everyone i saw my story, but i figured i would chicken out. i really, really, really hate the idea of people reading my stories. yeah, i know, i'm a terrible author, but live with it.)

DawnofWednesday@gmail.com

i'm putting it up on my Skype, too. hopefully i'll forget it's up there.
i know it sounds silly, but seriously. i need people to read it and TELL ME WHAT THEY THINK. if they're like, "wow, you suck." then i can keep my writing happily to myself. if they're like, "Hey, this is good!" maybe i'll actually look into getting it published. so while i'm afraid of it, i have to do it. it's time. (i'm not ready!)

so, shoot me an e-mail. and please, please tell me what you think. THANKS! you guys are the best. i think. hopefully. =]

Tom. Has. Never. Seen. Mulan.

i might have already told you that. but i was in such a state of shock when i discovered it, that i can't remember.
HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE SEEN MULAN?
oh well. i'm fixing it. Tom and Ray and i got ice cream, and we're watching it.
except that, see...
my curfew is 10. (Well, it's really more their curfew than mine. it's my parents rule that on school nights everyone is out by 10.)
that's twenty minutes from now, kids.
and Ben has this idea that he's my father, or something, because i've been listening to him upstairs, telling my mother that he's going to come down and throw the boys out.
(he's really pissing me off. =])
anywaay... i sent my book to Paige. (the one i'm working on right now.) i don't know if she's even started it yet, but it's really a step in the right direction for me, you know? i mean... i only let, like, Joelle read my books. (although Jo's college friends apparently borrowed her copy of Confession of Pain to read. i don't remember if i asked what they thought, i think i was too scared. hehe.)
it's about Greek gods. (i've always had kind of a thing for Greek gods. they're pretty cool.)
i went shopping yesterday, and i got new shoes. they're the tallest shoes i own now. they're black and white striped wedges. (but it's okay that they're super, super tall, because i'm still not taller than Ray. i hate being taller than, like, Ben, and Dad, and Ray. Micah's okay, he's supposed to be shorter than me. but depending on who i'm going somewhere with, like, if i go hang out with Jacob, or Jaa, or people like that, i adjust my shoes accordingly.)
speaking of Jacob, he's in basic or whatnot. i miss him already. -super sad face- i think i'll write to him--not that he'll write back. but my aunt gave me his address down there, so i figure i might as well write. =]
Ashley Z. and i went shopping for her wedding dress. (i forgot to get a picture of it on my phone. i meant to get a picture and put it up, but it slipped my mind when i saw her in the dress. she looked gorgeous.) she didn't go traditional wedding dress, since she's just having a super super tiny wedding, like, justice of the peace style wedding. (although, they're getting married at the church now. yay!) anyway, the dress she chose was purple with flowers all over it, and really light. a nice summer dress. she looked splendid. i completely adore her. :)
other exciting events? hold on, silly, i'm thinking.
Finale. did i tell you about that? oh well, doesn't matter. it went really well. especially since we had barely worked on our music, you know? oh well. it was fun. i cried, but only because Ashley Shuff... and Mrs. Stainbrook were crying, and they were RIGHT NEXT TO ME. -grumbles-
Jo's in Kansas. she'll be back, soon, though.
uhm...
two more days of school left!
my grandparents are back from Georgia. (celebrate!)
OH OH OH!
my mommy broke her leg.
(someone is on crutches in our house and IT'S NOT ME!)
although, it's not really very happy. see, she hurt herself, and then she decided to jog on her injured leg. (hello, stress fracture!) poor mommy. she really, really despises her crutches, too. she has big bruises on her arms, like, the insides, from where the crutches rub against it. it pretty much sucks.
Calvary had their youth sunday, i'll tell you about that tomorrow. i managed to attempt knocking a ladder on my head and i cut my thumb. (now that's talent, ladies and gents.)
Lissa's bridal shower was today. i hung out with Max. (he's so stinking cute!)
oh, yeah. Tuesday is our LAST PRACTICE. -super sad face- (soccer, btw.)
and Saturday is our last game. i'm going to miss these kids so much!
(also, Brock got 1) thrown to the ground by one of my players, 2) tripped, and 3) smashed his head against the ground. it was not a good game for him. but he was a real trooper, for a 5 year old, and kept playing. i think he might be my favorite on the team. well... Max might be first. but that's required.)
can't think of anything else i've done lately that's interesting. and i'm starting to have trouble typing, so it's time to sleep. night!

Lafaera

P.S. Ray used his feet to pick up my mountain dew. feet are gross. i hate feet. why do people have feet. isn't it fortunate that we have cute shoes? isn't it odd that i thoroughly despise feet, and yet i love shoes so much? whatever. i'm going to sleep. night!

Larkwhisper Is Still A Cool Name

Mom had a bad day Sunday.
so we went to Red Lobster, just the two of us, and then to Barnes and Noble. (What's better than crab meat and books? hmm? the answer is pretty much nothing, except cake. maybe.)
okay. soooooooooo...
i bought two things. due to my current obsession with birds, it comes with the territory of writing a story with a main character named Larkwhisper (inspired by yours truly!), i bought myself this cute little notebook.
isn't it cute? i love it. it's blank inside, perfect for writing. =]
anyway, the other thing i bought was a book called Hawksong.
i have this bad habit of not paying attention to the authors, which can sometimes get me into a little trouble. (Like accidentally picking up a book by Stephanie Meyer, for example. oh, fateful day. just teasing, i knew who she was, i just can't not finish a series. but other authors, that i should know are crazy feminists/serial killers/the leader of communist Russia/whatnot. not really to that extreme, but generally just authors that i didn't like something else by them, and wouldn't have picked up their book if i had realized who they were.)
well, i picked up Hawksong. now, i got home, and as i was reading, i thought to myself, "Hey. this writing style feels so familiar. wow... it feels like..." -checks book cover- "Oh, yeah it is. Amelia Atwater-Rhodes."
which i'm totally okay with. i'm rather fond of her, in a big sister/little sister way. (Depending on what thing i'm talking about.) for example, when i read her book, which is, by the way, rather simplistic in writing style, with large, often hard to pronounce fantasy names and things like that, i feel like an incredibly proud older sister. like, i read In The Forests of the Night, and i was like, "Wow. for a 15 year old girl, this is pretty stellar." and now i just keep reading stuff by her, and i'm watching her writing style grow and blossom and she's so much more accomplished now... and yet it still has an almost childlike quality about it. it makes me think of me, kind of. but different. we write differently. but it's the essence that's the same.
anyway. i also feel like a little sister. because, well, i wish i could get my book published. i wish i could be just like her, and have someone read my book and be like, "Hey, isn't that awesome!" and publish it for me. but that's not going to happen.
i'm not forward enough.
also, i think a little of the joy will be taken out of it for me.
Ben's sending his children's book to a publisher.

[this is where i'm going to whine a little bit. (Sorry, guys, i've been in a bad mood.)
i've written two full length novels. (Granted, they're not amazing. but they don't suck, and i like them, and other people like them, and i've worked hard on them.)
Ben wrote a children's novel. yes, it's awesome.
Mom read it and got all excited and helped him find a publisher and won't shut up about it.
she hasn't even read either of mine.
i even offered to let her. i gave her my first one, in a nice, bound copy, and said she should read it.
four months later, i finally asked if she had finished it, because i really needed to get it to the girl who had offered to help me edit it.
she had read, like, a page, and then set it down and hadn't even looked at it again. it was in the bottom of a drawer somewhere. she had to look for it.
that really, really, really hurt my feelings. so i know i'm not going to get any help from her. i'd like to get it published, but i don't think i'd be able to deal if my conversation goes like this.
Me: OMG I'M GETTING MY BOOK PUBLISHED AND AAAAAAH!
Mom: that's nice, sweetie. did you hear what Ben did? he got his children's book published. it was so amazing, and he even drew his own pictures. isn't he awesome?
Me: ... uh... yeah... i guess so...
Mom: Yes, he's perfect.
Me: i'm going to go now.
Mom: okay. oh, yeah, good job.
or this.
Me: i didn't get my book published. they didn't like it.
Mom: i'm sorry, sweetie. Ben got his children's book published. it was so amazing, and he even drew his own pictures. isn't he awesome?
Me: -bursts into tears-
Mom: OMG WHY ARE YOU CRYING? -confused face-

so, yeah. both of those sound pretty sucky. so i figure it'd be better just to not do it. (or not tell my mother, and publish under a different name. MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)]

Anyway. i went to a funeral yesterday. it. was. awkward. see, it was my aunt, so my mother was really, really, really upset. but, see, the last time we'd seen her was when she came to our house to give me a christening gown. (Yes, i'm serious. it's been, like, 17 years.) so i didn't know her. and it was a lot of meeting cousins i didn't know, and an uncle i've never met... not fun. Dad took us out to lunch, and then we came home.

Finale was last night. interestingly enough, Finale is also tomorrow. (who knew you could have more than one Finale? =])

also, Paige and Elliot broke up. Elliot and i have plans to watch Moulin Rouge! and eat ice cream. super fun. =] (Not that they broke up, that we're going to hang out.)

Later, kids. =]